Saturday, January 28, 2006

Lost and Found

Found: Three shell casings to a .40 calibur handgun, located directly in front of my mother's driveway. You were driving a dark-colored late model mid-size pickup truck, and at approximately 6:45 PM last night, you rolled down your window, looked directly at my mother (who was standing outside), and fired at least 4 shots straight into the air, then continued driving at a leisurely 25 mph and turned right three streets up. According to HPD (who showed up several hours after calls to 911), your shell casings are regarded as Found Property. Please contact me, so that I might refer you to the officer currently in possession of said evidence, I mean property. Please also give me your license plate number, driver's license number, and the registration data for the handgun you used, so that I can verify that these are in fact your shell casings.
Sincerely,
Sleepless Mama

4 comments:

Cowboy said...

I think you should just buy the culprit (I mean "person who lost the casings) some brand new ones. With bullets. And return them to him in the same fashion he lost them. (But you'd probably better point them at the car to make sure he doesn't lose these ones)

Jenny said...

Oh my gosh - that's so scary.

Hope they catch the jerk.

Justin said...

Holy crap!! That is scary stuff. I hope she isn't too rattled.

Sleepless Mama said...

And the worst part? The cops aren't looking. They aren't even classifying the case as "public endangerment" or anything like that. They know perfectly well that this idiot will never be caught (Mom didn't see his plate number), and that he's just one of many Friday Night Gun Toting Joyriders. Our police force is horribly understaffed at this time, so really, there's just not much that can be done.

Mom's okay, though. She's got enough going on as it is, and she's got no time to be bothered by assmonkeys.